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Dinnertime: It’s still the perfect opportunity for parents and children to connect. And while homework and extracurricular activities may abbreviate the time you spend at the table, the right table talk strategy can turn even the briefest dinnertime into quality time.

Conversing with Kids

For generations, the typical conversation starts (and often ends) like this: 

Parent: “How was your day?” 

Child: “Fine.” 

Children don’t typically have the conversational skills yet to narrow down and articulate information from an entire day that would interest the parent. Moreover, they may not remember everything that happened and are reluctant to expend the energy to keep the conversation going.

Fortunately, there are a few simple ways strike up a substantive exchange. By asking specific questions, a conversation will flow more naturally, and as it does, you find you have enough information to follow up on topics that interest your child.

Here are 10 questions to get you started:

• What are three things you like about your school?

• Tell me your favorite thing about your teacher.

• What is the hardest/easiest part of your day?

• What is your favorite/least favorite subject and why?

• Who do you spend most of your time around, and why do you like that person?

• What happened today that was funny, or who makes you laugh at school?

• Who do you sit with at lunch?

• Who seems to have the hardest time at school, and what can you do to help them?

• How was (music, library, etc.) today?

• What did you do during recess?

You can teach them to share by talking with them about what happens in your life as well. While it may not be appropriate to divulge emotional issues, you can keep them in the loop of your daily life. Let them know who you talked to during the day, what you did at work and other details that defined your day.

Why Conversation Matters

An open line of communication makes for a happier, healthier child and positive associations with dinnertime and parents. 

The more you converse with your kids, the closer you will be to them. When they feel your investment in their lives, they’re more likely to come to you with challenges and questions rather then depending on their friends or their own judgment.